A blonde decides to join the military thinking she can satisfy a couple of guys.What is wrong v this joke?1. This isn"t a joke2. The blonde is thinking
You are watching: Where does a general keep his armies
Vote: share joke
A crusty old Sergeant significant found self at a gala event, held by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of very young, idealistic females in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant major for conversation. She said, "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, however you seem to be a an extremely serious man. Is something bothering you?" "Negative, ma"am," the Sergeant major said, "Just major by nature." The young lady looked in ~ his awards and decorations and also said, "It looks choose you have actually seen a the majority of action."The Sergeant Major"s short reply was, "Yes, ma"am, a the majority of action." The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you need to lighten up a little. Relax and also enjoy yourself." The Sergeant significant just stared at her in his significant manner. Ultimately the young lady said, "You know, ns hope friend don"t take it this the not correct way, but when is the last time you had actually sex?" The Sergeant major looked at her and replied, "1955." She said, "Well, over there you are. Friend really have to chill out and also quit taking every little thing so seriously!I mean, no sex because 1955! Isn"t that a little extreme?" The Sergeant Major, glancing in ~ his watch, claimed in his matter-of-fact voice, "You think so? It"s only 2130 now." ns LOVE THAT army TIME!!
Vote: share joke
Airman Jones was assigned come the induction center, whereby he advised new recruits about their federal government benefits, especially their GI insurance. The wasn"t long prior to Captain smith noticed that Airman Jones was having actually a staggeringly high success-rate, marketing insurance to practically 100% that the recruits the advised. Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the earlier of the room and also listened to Jones" sales pitch. Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and also then said: "If you have GI Insurance and go into battle and also are killed, the federal government has to salary $200,000 to her beneficiaries. If you don"t have GI insurance, and you go into battle and also get killed, the federal government only needs to pay a best of $6000. Now," that concluded, "which team do friend think they space going come send into fight first?"
Vote: share joke
General McKenzie remained in charge of the Navy, and also he to be visiting his colleague general Marshall, who was in charge that the Army. McKenzie come at the army camp and is greeted through Marshall. They both walk around the place, and McKensie asks: "So how are your men?""Very fine trained, Gral. McKenzie.""I hope so. Girlfriend see, my males over at the Navy space so well trained, you could see they"re the bravest men all over the country." "Well, my males are very brave, too.""I"d prefer to watch that."So Marshall calls private Cooper and also says: "Private Johnson! I desire you to avoid that tank coming below with your body!""Are you crazy? It"d kill me, you idiot! I"m out of here!" As private Johnson ran away, Marshall turned come a bewildered McKenzie and said:"You see? You need to be pretty brave come talk prefer that come a general."
A Sergeant to be addressing a formation of 25 and also said: "I have a nice easy project for the laziest man here. Placed up your hand if you room the laziest." 24 men raised their hands, and also the sergeant asked the other guy "why didn"t friend raise your hand?" The guy replied: "Too lot trouble increasing the hand, Sarge."
See more: Difference Between Bitter And Sour & Bitter, The Difference Between Sour & Bitter
Q: What"s the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?A: mechanically engineers construct weapons; civil engineers develop targets.